As an organisational psychologist, I hope the answer to this is ‘Of course, we all want to grow and develop, tell me how?’ But is my viewpoint biased? The answer is yes.

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you knew what you needed to do, but just couldn’t seem to bring yourself to do it? Maybe it was starting a new exercise routine, preparing for a meeting, or having a difficult conversation with a friend. We’ve all been there at one time or another. This is the difference between knowing something and doing something.

As humans, we seek patterns and consistency in our interactions. As a result, we all naturally operate from some sort of system for understanding people. We generalize, explain, and predict our own and others’ behaviour based on our perceptions, experiences, and beliefs. When things don’t fit with those systems or expected patterns, we become unsettled.

We have a profound human need to be seen, heard, and believed in by the people who know us. Often it isn’t the big gestures of support that are foundational so much as the tiny everyday occurrences. When this connection is lacking, it becomes glaringly apparent.

While cultivating a positive outlook can be beneficial for our mental well-being, there’s a fine line between applying this in a healthy way versus one that is as the term suggests is ‘toxic’ to our brain.

When working with leaders it often takes a surprising level of cajoling to get them to think about how their strengths can be the key to taking their leadership to another level. We’re conditioned to think about what we can fix or what gaps we have rather than learning how to use our gifts to propel us forward.

Women’s and men’s brains are actually more similar than they are different. However, any woman and any man who has lived with a woman knows that our level of happiness, clarity of thinking and self-esteem are just a few things that can dramatically fluctuate.