I used to hear “You’re too young to handle this” more times than I can count, servers handing me the kids’ menu, HR doubting my impact. Yet, those same executives soon found themselves unpacking their childhoods with me in long sessions. That experience taught me a vital lesson: authenticity isn’t about never changing. It’s about knowing when to adapt without losing sight of who you truly are. Because sometimes, “that’s just how I am” can be a convenient excuse to avoid growth. And growth, messy as it is, is where real strength lives.

There’s a Bob at every party. Someone convinced he’s a master of emotional intelligence, but blind to his own blind spots. The real irony? The more certain we are of our emotional savvy, the more likely we’re missing the mark. After years as a psychologist, I’ve learned that true emotional wisdom is quiet, humble, and always curious. The moment we start explaining our EQ to others is the moment we’ve become Bob ourselves.